upon falling in love

upon falling in love
one time so furiously away
I step’d into the modern light
- I found my crimson decay
yet in a daze I still moved
dead, but nerves at their ends
yes with just a thought I corroded my mind
now here I am
- sourly and kind

upon falling in love, I watched the trains roll on
like crystal bend light to the nite airs stare
I left them with something to see me by
no heart or kind words
but I did leave them something to say
The Great Walrus and his parade
fell hopelessly in love with himself denying
the pleasure of loving another so dear
denying humanity for his fears

so with this the gloves fell through the empty rhymes
with nothing in them sane
wishing ev’rything numb once more
something more subtle maybe… a little less tense
you, you bastard haven’t your learned yet
no love is really kind… not worth a time or day
she’s gone to bait the frozen fish
a package you once knew…

upon falling in love
the writer died in his lines
axes…blades…wooden shots
for a name or assurance that things
will be normal again
but the lines held their strength …a glow of
gleam had been aware
of what had happen’d again before
the unlit touch appeared
…whom was it for…?

upon falling in love… I wrote poems and
odes and psalms…I gave them all
no meaning other than platonic leftovers from
the gallows of what was once my mind
…how then…now then…we are here again
exploring no new unknown…nothing worthwhile or
pleasurable…let me in I have candy…
as sad as it must seem; I crowd around nothing
for no one but me…am I wrong

no with a dream I’m always right
no matter who I harm…the law of the land
is laid down by pen or gun…whichever you
prefer but I demand a much more contemplated
movement before I trade in for anything…especially
love…my dear…left alone who knows what
would become of me, a lost day in the year
oh gosh…heaven’s what now?
I’ve got to breathe…please let me stop chocking

on the demands of an ill-gotten dream…good
news its over folks…the third world war…
you know once we destroy ourselves with our own
opinion we’re over and down with, so collide with
those dreams, long lost souls of yourself, feel your way
through the crude obsessions of life
I never thought life would be this fun
who knows maybe all will change tomorrow
who knows maybe I’ll change tomorrow

I once left things unattended
though I didn’t care and really don’t now
it would be so much easier if things would just self
destruct…you know I would leave Thee then
but that just isn’t reality anymore…not since
Star Trek or Star Wars was made…I live for dreams
in a bowl of coffee in Florida what’s your excuse…
no new news has left me more serious than what
I once started with…upon falling in love

a lost child in times of need
relinquish the old attitudes of yesterday once all is
gone and distraught is merely an after thought
we laugh and move along…so typical in
a liaison of fate, we trend each word we preached
in a hypocritical tease saying reality is merely what
never was…hence we have poor attitudes and
stupid sayings to mask the reality that is true and
real hard with life’s bitter gut of trials

if I told you I believe in nothing but now how would
that change you plans for tomorrow…if it was believed
that it will never come
would you drown in my disillusionment with me
and swallow the algae’s in our brains
Good Luck… better yet lets stay to see if
everything changes with fame
it always does…it changes from love of another
to love of a dream to love of oneself

one problem is we become jealous of ourselves
and then we cheat on ourselves to prove a point of
powerful morality that no one really believes anyway
… if the tables were turned…
if we pretended to elope and make love until dawn
would it change my mind…? would it change the way
you feel towards my beliefs
since I believe in now I can’t tell you a thing
we’ll just have to go and find out

if I were to die…I’d like to die in my
arms since they’ve held me the most…
my solitude is mine and I respect that
I ask no one to do the same…because they can’t
I’ll think of when I fell in love…and better
yet I’ll remember the taste I felt tonite
a little red but always the same
how much easier could it be done except if I simply
say…upon falling in love…




june 27, 1987


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©1987 Private Stock Poetry